


Birthday Pan Scramble

by ccauchemar



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Breakfast in Bed, Common Cold, M/M, Recipe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-10
Updated: 2019-12-10
Packaged: 2021-02-27 00:47:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21738640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ccauchemar/pseuds/ccauchemar
Summary: Roadhog wakes up on his birthday with a cold, and Junkrat takes it on himself to help him feel better.
Relationships: Junkrat | Jamison Fawkes/Roadhog | Mako Rutledge
Comments: 6
Kudos: 47





	Birthday Pan Scramble

**Author's Note:**

> this was my submission for the overcooked zine. submission date was 3 December 2018... yes, 2018. i busted my ass to get this out by the due date and i'm mad. i'm posting it as-is because if i tried to edit it i'd agonise for hours. consider this a character study :P
> 
> recipe's at the end; please let me know if you try it, it's one of my favourite low-effort comfort foods <3

“Hey. Hey. Roadie. Wake up.”

“Go away,” Roadhog mumbled, voice hoarse from sleep, as Junkrat shook his shoulder. Late morning light peeked through their venetian blinds, dimly lighting their tiny bedroom with its messy sheets and clothes piles and soft plushies.

Junkrat pouted. “It’s ya birthday, Roadie-”

“I don’t care.”

Junkrat was shocked! He couldn’t believe Roadhog didn’t care about his own birthday! “Oi, hog, what’s wrong?” he asked, shaking more gently.

A cough wracked Roadhog’s chest. He dragged a hand down the side of his face. “I‘m sick,” he mumbled.

“Aw, shit,” Junkrat said, “Hang on, uh, look, um, um, okay. Lemme look after you. What’s, what’s the first thing you want right now? I’ll get’cha anything.”

Roadhog wanted _peace and quiet._ Jamie, though well-meaning, was driving a headache into his skull. But he didn’t want to say that. “Breakfast,” he managed, and sniffed with a gross, wet sound.

A job. A mission. Junkrat saluted messily, though Roadhog couldn’t see. “I’ll get you brekky, Hoggie, just stay put. Here’s yer tissues. I’ll be back before ya know it!” He leaned over, put a tissue box next to Roadhog’s head, and rushed off.

Junkrat stood in the kitchen, surveying the potential crime scene. He’d had really bad scrapes with food before. His recipes tended to explode, intentionally or otherwise. It had taken months to make sure he wouldn’t burn toast. But this was an _ultra special occasion._ It was time to pull out ALL the stops of his limited cooking ability. Just like the neighbours taught him, bless the Khourys. All to help Roadhog feel better! To Junkrat’s addled mind it was a fantastic goal. And he could DO IT.

He just needed to be very, _very_ careful.

He bounced around the kitchen to retrieve the necessary ingredients for his most masterful of Eggy Breakfast Scrambles. Eggs, two tomatoes, spring onions, the bag of shredded cheese in the freezer, salt, and pepper. He liked salami or bacon with breakfast, but Hog didn’t like either. It’d have to be extra spring onions for now. _Sweet!_

Oh, and butter. Can’t forget that.

All fired up, Junkrat used a knife to scrape a knob of butter into the pan. He pointed his beady little pupils at it with great intensity as it melted on medium-high heat. _Wait, shit, tomatoes._ He whipped out the least-bluntest knife from the drawer full of metal tools (whaddya mean, he’d say, it’s perfectly safe) and chopped the tomatoes into chunks.

He moved the tomatoes around the pan, flipping them onto their sides, careful not to squish them, before going back to the spring onions and chopping like mad. Speed over accuracy, huzzah! Where anyone else would have finished with neat rounds of aesthetically pleasing scallion, his roughly-chopped greens looked more like ugly penne. He thought they looked fantastic, and dumped them into a clean bowl.

When the tomato skins had just begun to peel, he cracked eggs directly into the pan. “No shell, no worries,” he mumbled. Roadhog was a big eater. One, two, three, four, five eggs. He broke the yolks, threw in the spring onions, and mixed it up a bit. _Wait, the cheese!_ He added that too, mixed it again, and put a lid on it.

It smelled _great._ Junkrat bounced over to the bedroom. “Hey, Roadie, can ya smell that?” he asked.

Roadhog grunted a negative.

“You’ll smell it soon!”

“Is that a good thing?” Roadhog asked.

“It should be!” Junkrat said, ducking back into the kitchen to be extra, _extra_ sure he didn’t burn the food.

Aw, _sweet._ It was _time_. He took the pan off the burner — turned the fire off! — and put a couple pieces of wrap bread on top of the eggy mix, under the lid, to keep warm. He grabbed a wooden tray so he wouldn’t burn his hand on the pan, and carried it back to the bedroom.

“Oi Roadie. Roooadie,” Junkrat said, as softly as he could.

“What is it, Jamie?” Roadhog grumbled.

“Figured you couldn’t smell all that well, so I brought the smell to you.”

Roadhog made a confused noise and rolled over. “Oh,” he said, seeing the pan, “oh.”

“Pan-fried breakfast for a pannnsexual guy,” Junkrat said, and put the tray on the bedside table. “No washing, no worries.”

“Thank you,” Roadhog said. He took off his mask and sniffed. “Smells good.”

“You _can_ smell?”

“One nostril.” Roadhog tore a strip of bread and used it to pick up and eat some scramble.

Junkrat waited with bated breath.

Roadhog kissed the top of Junkrats head. “It’s perfect,” he said. “But you forgot salt.”

“Shit, I can go get some-”

“No. Stay and eat.” Roadhog handed him a strip of bread.

“Happy birthday, Roadie,” Junkrat giggled.

Roadhog hummed, content with food and good company. “It’s happier with you.”

**Author's Note:**

> RECIPE - Eggy Pan Scramble  
> serves two (or three)
> 
> \- 5 eggs  
> \- 2 tomatoes, chopped  
> \- 1 spring onion  
> \- 2 handfuls of cheese (mozzarella, tasty cheddar, or feta)  
> \- salt + pepper to taste  
> \- 1-2 flatbreads per head to serve
> 
> 1\. Put butter or oil in pan and heat over medium heat until melted  
> 2\. Fry tomatoes in pan. Stir occasionally to ensure even cooking. (Salting the tomatoes here improves flavour.)  
> 3\. As tomatoes are frying, chop spring onions into thin rounds. Set aside.  
> 4\. When tomatoes are cooked & the skins have just begun to peel, crack eggs directly into pan. Break yolks with spatula and stir until yolks + whites are lightly mixed.  
> 5\. Add spring onions and cheese. Fold into mixture. Don’t forget salt and pepper!  
> 6\. Put a lid on it and wait.  
> 7\. When eggs are mostly cooked, flip the mixture in chunks. Warm bread by placing on top of scramble.  
> 8\. Eat directly from pan by using chunks of bread to pick up the scramble.


End file.
